28 June 2010

Gay Pride Through Green Eyes

I grew up in a very conservative home. Maybe you wouldn't know it by looking at me - I guess there's not a lot of Christian girls out there rocking nose piercings, tattoos and pink hair. For the longest time, I got so frustrated because people would judge me based on how I look rather than who I am. But I choose to look like this. I choose to live my life the way I see fit. This is where my dilemma gets interesting.

See, all my life I have been around people who told me being gay is a sin - a choice people made when they want to be hateful toward God's plan, and don't care about being damned to an eternity in hell. When that way of thinking is all you hear, you tend to start believing it. Children who grow up to be racists were not born that way. They were taught to be prejudiced by the people around them. I didn't realize that I had been so wrong in my views on gay people until just recently, when a friend of mine came out and told me he was gay.

At first I was shocked, and a little angry, then I was afraid for him. I was upset because he kept this secret from me, and afraid because I feared my friend was going to hell. I asked him a question that I would later realize was foolish. I asked, "Why would you choose to be gay?" He looked at me with tears about to fall and said something that would change my view on gays and lesbians forever. He said, "Why would I choose to be mocked and hated? Why would I choose to have fewer rights than a straight man who pays the same amount of taxes as I do? Why would I choose such a depressing and lonely existence, knowing that in the United States, I could never marry the person I love? Why would I choose this, knowing that so many people that I shared a hug, a laugh, and a cry with will turn their backs on me as if I do not exist? I did not choose this any more than you chose to have green eyes."

I am choked up right now as I relive this. I cried so hard for my friend, and maybe selfishly, I cried for myself because I had been so wrong. Regardless of what someone's religious beliefs are, these are human beings we are talking about. People with feelings, and hearts that can be broken just as easily as yours and mine can. I cried because I thought of all the people committing suicide because they felt like they had to bear this burden alone. They are our brothers, our sisters, our aunts and uncles, friends, and even our children. I wept uncontrollably because I was guilty of feeling prejudiced thoughts against people who were different from me - just because they wanted to love someone. How in the world is having love for someone wrong? Somehow, a lot of us have this whole thing backwards. We act like the good guys for hating someone who only wants to be free to love.

I choose to look the way I do, and for that I have to realize strange stares and rude whispers are par for the course. But I now know that gays and lesbians did not choose to have the feelings they do, and they do not deserve to be treated like second-rate human beings. Personally, I believe we are all God's children, and we are all beautiful and entitled to love whomever we want. Don't try to stop someone from loving someone else just because you disapprove of their lifestyle, just worry about your own life and happiness, and let them have theirs.

My fellow Gimme Your Hand Freak, Donnie Kendall, passed something along to me that he found on the internet. I would like to share it with you now. GHYE gives a very special thanks to Shelby Feeny (Touch The Rain) for allowing us to share the following thoughts and photo:

Photo and accompanying thoughts Copyright Shelby Feeny. Used with permission.

"Let's play what if for a second. What if Straights were considered the abnormal? The unacceptable?? The untouchable?? What if Straights were openly mocked and destined to hell if they revealed that they could be attracted to the opposite sex??
Think about that , the next time you find yourself in the company of someone who loves a gender you dont. Do you realize the STRENGTH it takes to openly tell your friends and family you love something other than the norm?Do you have any idea what its like to be told your going to rot in the fiery pits of hell torment for simply loving another human being?? For LOVING AT ALL??

Do you have feelings that make you uncomfortable? Ask yourself why. Can you tell a friend of the same sex behind closed doors that you love them, can you kiss them and hold them... and then in public feel a need to assume a distance from them?? WHY?? To please WHOM?? This is a betrayal of YOURSELVES. AND those whom you love. And the longer it takes for us to “come out”, the longer it is going to be until more people can admit that love is love. There is NO shame... none whatsoever. Be PROUD of who you are, and the choices that you make... do not judge those of another choice... ACCEPT freely ALL others.

My words and a brilliant womans words combined."

Be Blessed,


  1. What a nice intimate look at your personal feelings. My sister came out 2 years ago and I was stunned but I new she was vulnerable so I made sure I didn't say anything she would take negatively. I stand by her I love her and I only got one sissy! I never had anything against gay people but when someone you know is gay you become more aware of the prejudice in the world. Thanks for sharing this story Kylee! (:

  2. does anyone else see a double standard when it comes to gay people? like it's ok to show two girls kissing and alot of guys say that is a turn on but two guys kissing? oh hell no! the whole world wants to send them to hell. there are more important things to worry about than how someone else lives their life. ps teddy is what you call an asshole.

  3. Is Donnie missing something here, princess? Teddy is free to speak his mind (no matter how narrow and petite), but two people of the same sex are not free to hold hands or hug? See, that is the problem with people like you. You're too busy running everyone else's life, that you don't have time to mind your own damn business. If you don't like seeing that kind of LOVE, then why the hell don't YOU leave?